I read this post and wanted to share it here because it is a really great read and it says a lot of things that I feel, even though the post is referring to people dealing with childhood trauma and abuse. It is called Why Survivors Need Each Other
It was posted at an interesting time, since I was just looking for the paper from my group therapy where we all put down our phone numbers and full names for each other. For 12 weeks I was with these people, trusting them with my most traumatic thoughts and feelings, but I only knew their first names. That stuck out to me as odd today, but only for a moment. Their last names were not important in order to know them, but I had never thought about it before today. I still think of those women often, and gather strength in bad moments from their bravery and their encouragement and their trust in me being able to push forward each day.
I think it is time for me to reach out to one, two, or all of them for a reconnection of sorts. I miss them. I miss their smiles and their laughs, their inspiration and their resilience. I need them. And the article referenced above says why. They understand me without much effort and without ANY judgment. They get it in a way people who aren’t survivors just cannot get inside the anxiety that comes with the traumatic responses I sometimes have in certain situations. And more than that, I want them to know that I think about them and I still cheer them on each day. I want to know they are ok and let them know that I am too.
I suppose group therapy for a set amount of time makes sense because if there is no end, it is really an ongoing support group like AA. Sometimes, I think a support group that kept on going would be better than what I experienced with a group that had a clearly defined beginning and end. But I also believe that having steps to the group that led up to the disclosure and then wrapping up those defining moments and putting an end to it gives some definition to the assault in terms of now it is in the past and I can heal properly to move forward. Now I have given the shame and the responsibility over to the criminals and relieved myself of that burden.
I love that I have supportive friends and family. And I love that I now have added these amazing women to my life, who without even being present, support and inspire me every single day.