Tag Archives: victim-blaming

What I must say about Cosby

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Every single article that comes out about Bill Cosby irritates me to the point of having to use my good coping resources. It’s not even the articles so much as the responses to the articles. The ignorant, victim-blaming, hateful comments from people who think it is some intentional “destruction of a legacy” is just ridiculous.

Let me start by saying that I was not there, I don’t know him, and I don’t know any of the women coming forward. I can honestly say his personality makes me uncomfortable, but I can also admit that who I see as a celebrity, isn’t always who the person really is in life. But my guts are good, and he’s always given me the creeps.

I believe every single woman coming forward with their stories about Bill Cosby. And I think it is brave and awesome because what I see in these stories is that women are sick of being told to shut up about being wronged.

Rape is in the news and it is freeing survivors from the burden of their secrets and their shame. And that opens them up to love and healing. And the telling of stories brings more women out of their shame until we, as women, will no longer tolerate how the world blames us for the crimes of others.

I love that. I adore every brave woman that comes out of her corner of shame to release that burden and put the blame where it belongs.

I believe the survivors. These women accusing Cosby have not asked for money and are very aware he won’t go to jail for what he did to them so long ago. And to imply they are coming forward for fame is just absurd. All survivors take a huge risk telling their stories and face horrible backlash from strangers, and often times friends and family. That’s not the kind of fame anyone looks for in life.

It makes me so angry that people will defend celebrities to the point of making threats to victims and tearing apart their character. It’s so easy for people to call out the victims for being horrible people who are just after money or fame, but most don’t know the celebrity they defend any more than they know the woman they are dragging through the mud.

You think you know that actor, singer, coach, or athlete just because you watch them on TV?? You think that making gobs of money means someone is automatically a good person?? How awful it must be to have lost touch with reality and the people you can actually connect with in your life to idolize someone who doesn’t care one bit about you and never will.

I don’t get that at all.

I believe the women. Until I’m given proof that they are not worthy of my respect and support, I believe them. Because not believing them is the bigger risk. To them and to all people who are victims of rape.

KK

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