I write a lot of posts and journals, but I haven’t shared any for a very long time. According to the statistics in here, it’s been about three years since I’ve published a post even though I have more that I’ve written saved as drafts just for myself. A lot has changed in that time, but a lot has stayed the same too. I’m different, but I’m the same. The country and the world are different, but also the same.
I’m still a therapy client. Maybe I’ll always be, and that’s ok. Sometimes I go often, and sometimes I go less often depending on what is going on in my life and how much support I need. I need less support in some areas because I have a really great husband I share most everything I’m thinking with and I can get a lot of relief or validation that way. In addition, I have fantastic friends. Many more than I ever thought I would want or need if I’m being completely honest. I often felt like it was true that a person only needs a few quality friends and for many people I think that IS true. But, I collected some absolutely, top-notch people along my new path since 2015 and I can’t imagine giving any of them up because gosh, I am so lucky to have each and every one in my life and corner. They laugh with me when I need, or just want, to have fun. They empathize when I struggle. They lift me up when I am in need of support. And they like me at my best and my worst. I sure hope I’m the same for them. They are SO valuable and so fantastic!
I find that I am back where I began when people ask me often why I don’t talk more about my story. So maybe writing just for myself and not sharing it is fine when I need that, but maybe I’ll also go back to sharing some things.
I think it’s really important to share our best AND our struggles with each other. Because how else can we feel validated when we are scared, rejected, or feel like we are failing than to hear from others that they felt or feel like that too? There’s such value in learning from each other what worked when someone was struggling. Often times struggles have company called shame. Why do we allow ourselves to walk around feeling shame?? It’s not necessary, it’s really not.
I believe that sharing our struggles helps unburden us of the shame because we quickly hear “me too.” So I’ll share some struggles, but I’ll share how I’ve overcome them too. Because I’m in a great place, and I want others to be too. I’ve prioritized self-care, and I get a lot of questions about how I do that. I just do! I am alone this weekend on a trip, as I try to do when I can and not enough people do this for themselves. Maybe if I keep talking about it, more people will do it. Maybe that’s a part of my purpose, helping people to find their self-care goals and learning how to be alone. Maybe that’s why I had to struggle so much to like being with me, so I could work to show other people how very important that is to me now.
My alone trips are so critical to my mental health that I would never give them up now, I simply couldn’t and would not want to do that. You should try it. You won’t regret it, I promise!
KK
From Me and Back Again 